Round 3 - Return of the Meme

[hhanon]

Round 3 - Return of the Meme

General Rules

• Personal attacks and any kind of abusive trolling, hate speech, or bullying are obviously forbidden. Anon comments violating this rule will be deleted, signed in members will be banned.
• If your comment is deleted/screened/frozen and you don't know why, please email the mod at  hhanonmeme@gmail.com. (If you notice it happening to your comments and you know they're safe, a quick email for the mod to come and unscreen them would be helpful also).
• Prompt posts will close to new prompts at 3,000 comments.

Prompting Rules

• One prompt per comment. 
• Please follow the correct format (see below).
• Include trigger warnings in the subject line. Use your discretion and please be considerate.
• If your prompt is missing something, such as a subject or a warning, repost it in it’s entirety. It is not enough to reply to your own comment with the missing information. The mod will delete the previous duplicate comment.
• Multiple fills of the same prompt by different author!anons are allowed.
• If for any reason you start a fill but feel you can't finish the WIP you've created, and if you're happy to let someone finish it for you, put it up for HH Meme Fostering and Adoption.
• Prompts for projects other than Horrible Histories (ie. Spy, Gavin and Stacy, Rev, St. Trinian's, the O2 adverts etc., and RPF involving actors from those projects should be posted at the What? They've acted in other things?! post.

Format of Prompts

• Put [RPF] before RPF prompts. 
• For crossover prompts: "[Crossover], HH Character(s)/Other Character(s), [Fandom]" 
• Anyone, everyone, no one? Use "Other."
• Put [GEN] before GEN prompts, just so you don't get unwanted shipping.
• Use appropriate warnings. I'm trusting you all to know what that means.
• Don't embed any photos, videos or other media.
• Copy and paste links in full; anon comments with active coded links are marked as spam  and the mod doesn't switch accounts often enough - it may be a few days before those  screened comments are de-screened (see: emailing the mod a heads up if it happens).

Archiving Prompts and Fills

• To make the archiving job easier, please drop a link to your fill/unprompted fic here at the fills post.
• Nothing here you fancy filling? Take a look at the unfilled prompts archived here or at Round 1 or Round 2.

That's nearly the end of the storia, for onto the scene comes our much loved meme: HAIL TO THE QUEEN OF PROMPTIA.

Comments

[Unprompted] Ben/Larry/Mat - PG13 - "Such A Wonderful Hippy."

[(Anonymous)]

((Silly ficlet based on when Ben called Mat a hippy on twitter))

Mat frowned at his phone. “Why am I a hippy?”

“Why are you a what?” Larry asked, returning with tea and biscuits.

“Ben told me I was a hippy.” Mat explained, showing Larry his phone and swiping a digestive at the same time.

Larry shrugged and turned the TV on. “I don’t know, maybe it’s about your hair, wait till he gets back from getting dinner and ask.”

Mat frowned again, cradling his tea with one hand and twirling his fingers in his hair, there was nothing wrong with his now long-ish hair. He turned his attention to the TV and tried not think about the fact that Ben might be criticising the way he looked.

When Ben got back some time later with far more Chinese food than three people could realistically hope to consume, Mat decided to tackle the issue head-on.

“Ben?” He asked, trying for casual as he sauntered through to the kitchen with Larry. “Why am I a hippy?”

“A what?” Ben raised an eyebrow at him in question.

“Your tweet, you called me a hippy.” Mat explained, taking the plates Larry handed to him and putting them down on the table.

“Oh that.” Ben stopped and gave him a slightly confused look. “But you are one, with the music and the clothes and that.”

Both Mat and Larry stared at him. “What?”

Ben frowned at them. “Yeah you know, with the skinny jeans and weird music that nobody has ever heard of.”

Mat and Larry managed to exchange one tiny glance with each other before both bursting into fairly hysterical laughter. Larry dropped the plate he was holding and Mat had to cling to the table to stay upright, all the while Ben continued to frown in hopeless confusion.

“What? What did I say?” He asked, clutching a mug of tea slightly desperately.

“Oh Ben.” Larry gasped eventually. “Ben, Benjamin.” He took several deep breaths and tried to calm himself, with considerably more success than Mat, who was a hopeless giggling mess.

“The word is hipster, not hippy.” Larry managed to explain between bursts of giggles that he wasn’t able to control. “Mathew is a hipster.”

“Oh.” Ben murmured, going an endearing shade of pink and putting his mug of tea down. “Sorry about that.”

“Ben!” Mat wheezed, finally regaining his ability to speak. “You are my favourite person; honestly you’re so posh it’s ridiculous.”

Larry nodded in agreement. “And how have you not heard of Mat’s music? You live with him.”

“Well I don’t know what any of it’s called, do I?” Ben huffed, beginning to feel somewhat defensive.

“He’s too busy listening to Radio 4.” Mat chimed in, which set both Larry and himself off again.

Ben just scowled and swiped the spring rolls before storming off to the front room to find something cricket related on telly, served them bloody well right.

Re: [Unprompted] Ben/Larry/Mat - PG13 - "Such A Wonderful Hippy."

[(Anonymous)]

asdfghjkl This was lovely and sweet and funny and I love it <3

Re: [Unprompted] Ben/Larry/Mat - PG13 - "Such A Wonderful Hippy."

[(Anonymous)]

naaawwww this is too cute

[(Anonymous)]

XD Ben, you posh thing you!! Ben just scowled and swiped the spring rolls before storming off to the front room to find something cricket related on telly, served them bloody well right. Oh childish reaction there Ben! XD

Dick Turpin/James Smith, modern AU

[(Anonymous)]

As based on this: http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lw2bbcmlrQ1qlf4uwo1_500.png

…James taught Dick in secondary school, before he (Dick) skipped town at the end of sixth form and went God knows where. But now he’s back, and a few added years has made dear Mr. Smith a lot more tempting.

[RPF] Mat/Jim

[(Anonymous)]

Lazy days at home. Filled with cuddles, a refusal to rush and maybe even some nudity besides~.

Re: [RPF] Mat/Jim

[(Anonymous)]

Lovely idea, maybe over the Christmas holidays when you haven't got anything or anywhere to go.

Charles II/Sotherby

[(Anonymous)]

Charlie building a snowman, Sothers trying not to find that adorable.

FILL: Charles II/Sotherby (1a/1)

[(Anonymous)]

Even in the depths of sleep, Sothers can hear his name being called. He wriggles deeper into his sheets, hiding from the inevitable wake-up call he's about to get. He wonders what on earth the King could want... Then decides he'd rather not know.There's a rustle at the door, a thud and then - bang! The door's open and a gangly figure bounds into his chambers. 
"Sothers! Sothers! Sothers!" he 'whispers', and Sothers reluctantly opens an eye. 
"What is it sire?" Charles' eyes are shining and he waves his hands excitedly.
"It's snowed! Come on, get up!" he tugs at Sothers' sheets.
"Sire!" he yelps, grasping at the covers. 
"Must you really wake me, just to tell me about the weather?" he says, pulling himself from the bed.
"Yes! Because you and I are going outside! Come on, get dressed; cook's done us some tea to take!" he smiles broadly at Sothers. 
"It'll be simply marvellous!"  Sothers sighs, opening his wardrobe's doors. Charles is literally bouncing by his side as he pulls out an outfit.
"No, that one, it's lovely and warm! Now come on! We have to go!"  Sothers looks at him. 
"Sire, I'm capable of dressing myself. Could you possibly step outside for a minute?" The king laughs, bounds over to the door, and with a smile, tells him "You've got five!" before heading for the palace doors. 

That's how Sothers ends up standing in the freezing cold, hands clasped tight around his mug of tea. He's bundled up in his cloak, thankful for his drink. The snow is thick on the ground, well and truly burying his shoes. He stamps his feet to keep warm, and looks for the king, who's somewhere in the vast gardens. He follows the trail of footprints with his eyes, and they lead up to one of the grand trees. Then stop. He sighs; he should probably go and see to him. He takes off down the path, careful not to slip on the perilous ground.
"Your majesty?" He calls. A few seconds later a voice floats back. 
"One second Sotherby!" There's some rustling, above him and a snap. Sothers looks up... to find Charles perched precariously on a branch in the tree (He should be shocked, but this is Charles, after all)
"Watch out!" he calls and with surprising grace, leaps from the tree to land neatly next to Sothers. 
"What on earth are you doing, sire?"  He asks, and Charles waves some branches at him. 
"Getting these! Come on!" he runs off, somehow avoiding landing head first in the snow. He skids to a stop at the top of the path, and turns to call Sothers up. He makes his way up the path again, much more careful than Charles. He can see the king crouched over something, and hear him singing to himself. A smile tugs at Sothers lips, seeing Charles so excited. It gets harder to hide the grin when Charles spins around, eyes shining and a smile lighting his face. His nose has gone a light pink from the cold, making him look more a child than ever. He tugs at Sothers arm
"Are you ready?" Sothers chuckles.
"For what, exactly?"
"Snowmen!" 

Charles points to the ball of snow he's begun rolling, and the twigs on the floor. 
"It'll be wonderful! Here, hold this," he says, handing Sothers a carrot. While Sothers watches, he rolls the ball around, until it reaches waist hight. Then he starts on another one, and Sothers almost bursts out laughing, watching him struggle to put it on top of the larger one. 
"Would you like some help, sire?" he asks, smiling fondly at the kings back. He turns his head, face screwed up with concentration.
"No! I can do this - I... Just... have to - aha!" with a flourish, he finally manages to get it on. Sothers bites back his smile as the king gets to his knees and goes hunting for pebbles. There's a small "Wonderful!" when he finds some, and he comes back grinning as he fashions them into eyes and buttons. He grabs the twigs from the ground and is carefully (not a word Sothers though he'd ever use to describe Charles) putting them into place, when slowly but surely, snow begins to fall again. Finally, Charles removes his hat and places it on the rather grand snowman. Then he makes a full circle of the snowman, stopping by Sothers. Some of the snow has landed in his hair, and there are a few flakes that cling to his eyelashes. 

Dick Turpin/James Smith

[(Anonymous)]

I will preface this by saying that I adore, absolutely adore, poor James being constantly hurt by Dick. Have written it and prompted it many times… But I also have a strange fondness for characters being utter bastards to each other, yes. <<

So, my prompt: James being just as much of a bastard as Dick, just in a law-abiding way. The both of them being horrible to each other and having some really fantastic sex along the way.

WW1!Soldier Larry/Ed, cooking kink

[(Anonymous)]

From this sketch: http://fuckyeahhorriblehistories.tumblr.com/post/7760554370/fuckyeahhorriblehistories-historical-masterchef#notes

…Yeah. Whether it’s them cooking together, one of them cooking for the other or even kitchen sex. Anything around that! :D

[RPF] Ben/Jim clothing kink

[(Anonymous)]

Ben loves it when Jim wears layers, especially sweaters because then he can peel them off Jim.

Re: [RPF] Ben/Jim clothing kink

[balinese-baby.livejournal.com]

Oh yes please.

Nelson/Hardy - handjobs

[(Anonymous)]

So, Nelson lost his right arm, which makes certain *ahem* activities involving the right hand tough for him. Luckily Hardy's around to help out.

(Crossover) Charles/Sothers - the Sound of Music

[(Anonymous)]

Charlie is a busy father of many children, who hasn't got the time to look after them. That's when a young Sothers arrives to help out. Charlie isn't quite sure about some of his techniques though... Sothers soon ends up falling for his employer (because who wouldn't?) but he's due to be married to Catherine soon.

What ever will happen?

Lots of bonus points for including 'Favourite Things' and 'Edelweiss' because they're awesome!

Richard III+Thomas More+William Shakespeare apologizes fluff

[(Anonymous)]

After filling the song, More and Shakespeare realize how much Richard resents them and decide to look into the controversy further. When they look at some of the counter-arguments, they decide to apologize.

[(Anonymous)]

Still not feeling festive? - Jim, Larry, Ben and Mat. [RPF]

Larry frowned and threw his iPhone across the room. He paused for a moment with a fixed scowl on his face before squeaking, scrambling to get it.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” He cradled it in his arms, rocking a little.

It vibrated slightly, notifying him of a new tweet.

I hear you, Larry, I hear you.

Good. He thought, smiling to himself. At least Ben agrees with me. Christmas is stressful. He huffed, putting the phone onto the coffee table and going out of the room to get himself a drink.

Larry flicked the switch on the kettle and absently pulled his favourite mug from the cupboard. He dropped a tea bag in and leaned against the kitchen side, waiting for the water to boil. He heard his phone buzz again for the other room and glanced at the kettle before going to check it.

Are you trying to make me eat that star again? Because I will, just to prove a point.

Larry snorted. That’d be a sight; Jim Howick stuffing his face with the glass star on top of his Christmas tree. He must really love Christmas if he’s willing to risk internal bleeding and the loss of his tongue after that. Maybe not, that tongue would be dearly missed… I’d better say something to settle the score.

That wouldn’t make me more festive; it would just make me miss Xmas dinner due to being at your bedside.

He smirked to himself and heard the kettle ping. “Oh!” He dashed out of the room and then made a mental note that tea wasn’t that exciting, certainly not exciting enough to be running for it. He also made note to give himself a smack on the wrist, after the tea of course.

Don’t make me get the mistletoe.

Larry laughed, seeing Jim’s response. By all means, I wouldn’t mind that... He thought, smiling as he tapped a response.

If you’re offering, mate. I’ll put on my best suit. It’s a date.

As a man true to his word, within half an hour Jim was at Larry’s door. He stood here with a raised eyebrow and a piece of mistletoe in his hand.

“If you’re still not feeling festive after this, I will eat my hat.” Jim shook his head slightly to make the bell jingle.

Larry beamed, “I’m afraid I couldn’t find my suit.”

“No worries.” And with that Jim leaned in and kissed Larry on the lips. The kiss lasted for a few more moments than it should have and then finally he pulled away, both of them smirking at the other.

“Oi!” Came the cry from across the road. The pair spun round to see Mat almost skipping across the road, carrying his own cutting of mistletoe.

“Am I too late for the snogging antics?”

“Of course not!” Jim beamed at him, giving him a smooch too once he’d reached them. Larry laughed and then grinned, seeing Ben emerge from his car not far down the road. Ben had a smug smile on his face that still somehow managed to look innocent.

“I saw something about mistletoe?” He looked at them all with innocent eyes, trying to hide his smirk.

“You’ll have to ask Jim and Mat if they mind you joining.” Said Larry with raised eyebrows.

“Guys?”

Jim and Mat stared at each other; telepathically deciding whether they’d let Ben join in their snog session with Larry.

“Hmm, well…”

“…I’m sure it’ll be-”

“-No trouble.”

The grinned at each other as Larry stepped out the way to let them all in.

“Luckily for you all, the kettle’s just boiled.”

“No need, Laz.” Ben said, holding up the beers he’d brought with him.

“Ah.” He smiled, “I should have known. Beers, mistletoe and my best friends…”

“…Alright, now I’m feeling festive.”

[(Anonymous)]

I love you <333333333333333333333333

[hhanon.livejournal.com]

*sigh* So the comment-box change has gone into effect. Very well.

PLEASE READ THIS - love, Mod
Given that in LJ's infinite wisdom, apparently subject lines aren't required by fandom, our current method of prompt formatting is screwed. Fucked. Smegged, even.

ERGO PLEASE FORMAT YOUR PROMPTS LIKE THIS, JUST WITHOUT THE *:
<*b>[what would have been your subject line]
Your prompt below.

So that it looks like this:
[what would have been your subject line]
Your prompt below

An entry with similar updates is about to be posted on the main page.

Thank you for your time, and if anyone knows of a way to bring back the subject line, email hhanonmeme@gmail.com ASAP.

[(Anonymous)]

Roundhead!Simon/Roundhead!Ben Battle of Naseby, angst, UST, post-battle sex

The roundheads were seperated into different parts of the New Model Army - one in the group that was held back, one in the group that was attacking. They were close before, but after nearly loosing their lives multiple times, when they are reunited at the camp they finally snog each other senseless. Finally realizing that their feelings are requited they have sex

[(Anonymous)]

[RPF] Holiday Cheer - the Cast d charity work

Visiting sick kids, doing food drives, performing a Red Nose skit, anything with the cast being charitable sweethearts.

[RPF] Holiday Cheer - the Cast doing charity work

[(Anonymous)]

Visiting sick kids, doing food drives, performing a Red Nose skit, anything with the cast being charitable sweethearts.

(Honestly I can't type today; sorry everyone. Please replace the above with this.)

[(Anonymous)]

Mrs/Mr Miserable hate-sex

It's the only way they can justify sex - using it as punishment. Please keep it consensual, though.

Maltravers/Blenkinsop, kissing under the mistletoe

[(Anonymous)]

…:D

Hardy/Beatty/Nelson (In any combination)

[(Anonymous)]

Hardy is a merman that Beatty and Nelson accidentally capture from the sea… And go from there.

Re: Hardy/Beatty/Nelson (In any combination)

[amine-eyes.livejournal.com]

and then sex.

*shameless person is shameless*

Bob/Mike, after sex snuggles

[(Anonymous)]

…:DDD

[RPF] Simon/Ben/Mat

[(Anonymous)]

…Anything? :D

[RPF] Ben/Larry, Falling asleep on each other

[(Anonymous)]

…Preferably pre-slash leading into slash if that’s at all possible?

But, yes, them falling asleep on each other – and then waking up to find themselves a little closer than they should be. :DDD

[RPF] Secret Santa

[balinese-baby.livejournal.com]

We've had the historical characters having a secret santa, what about the cast doing the same but buying each other inappropriate (sexy) gifts.

[RPF] NC-17 A party of our own - Jim/Martha.

[(Anonymous)]

Sometimes showbiz parties can just get too much and all you want is a familiar, friendly faced co-star for a quick shag.

~

Jim's hand rested on the small of Martha's back as he leaned over to whisper in her ear.

"When nobody's looking, did you want to slip upstairs?"

Martha's smirk was the only response Jim needed. A smug smile painted across his face, he took a drink from the passing platter. He watched her mingling with the crowd, his gaze passed over her hair, shoulders, glorious back, ass and then her legs... those legs... He swallowed, shoving a hand into his pocket and taking another sip.

"Alright?"

"Huh?" Jim looked over and saw Mat waving at him. "Oh, hello mate." He tried desperately not to make it obvious that he was still staring at Martha from across the room. His eyes kept running over her curves and he absently bit down on his lip.

"Are you alright?" asked Mat again.

"Fine, fine... Yeah." Jim nodded, squinting slightly and frowning as he saw Martha slip past the crowds and out the room.

"Hold this." Before he had a chance to respond, Jim had passed Mat his glass and slipped off through the crowds after Martha. Perhaps he seemed a little too eager but at this moment he really didn't care. He slipped out of the hall, dodging the tables as he went. He weaved in and out of them, loosening his tie as he went.

"Martha?" He called, once out in the hallway. "Where are you?"

He could hear her giggle from halfway up the stairs. He grinned and ran up them after her. Finally, he caught up with her.

"Why didn't you take the lift?" He asked, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"I wanted to see you work up a sweat for me." She grinned, placing her hands over his.

"Oh sweetheart, you know you can do that to me without making me run up any stairs. Just looking at your beautiful form makes me hot under the collar." He growled and began to nip at her neck.

Martha giggled, slapping his hand playfully. "Wait until we get to the room."

"Have you the key?" He asked absently, not really caring for a response. He'd shag her in the hallway if they didn't have the key for the room.

She nodded, getting the key out of her bag and unlocking the door. Jim placed himself down on the bed, laying there suggestively with raised eyebrows. His eyebrows raised so high at the sight of Martha pulling out some handcuffs from her handbag that they almost slid off the top of his head. "W-what...?"

Re: [RPF] NC-17 A party of our own - Jim/Martha.

[(Anonymous)]

"I thought we'd have some fun."

"I wondered why you had such a dirty smirk earlier..." he sat up, frowning a little. "Really?"

"Come on Jim," She purred, climbing onto the bed and straddling him, making him lay back down.

His eyes slipped straight down, and his gaze fell on her chest. At this, Martha pulled his head back up, tutting. "Nope."

"Wha- S-sorry..." He swallowed, watching the handcuffs very carefully. "What are you going to do with those?"

"What do you think?"

Within a second's movement Jim found his hands guided upwards and his wrists fastened to the bed post. His tie was pulled from around his neck and thrown to the floor. Martha's fingers worked at the perfect pace, unbuttoning his shirt with skill. Her lips kissed at his lips, and then slipped downwards, kissing gently but passionately at his neck.

Jim groaned, half with delight and the other with frustration. He wanted to run his fingers down her body, smoothly over her curves and pull her closer against his body. He wanted to twist her golden hair around his fingers. He closed his eyes, sighing softly as she nipped at his neck softly. Her hand slid downwards, moving to wrap around his cock. The silky material simply added to the effect as her hand moved, teasing him.

Martha's dirty grin widened as she felt Jim hardening in her hand, her mouth moving to meet his to muffle the moans now starting to escape his lips. Jim tugged against the cuffs, making grooves against his skin. He struggled even more as Martha moved her lips away and unfastened his trousers, leaning downwards and lifting him up to tease him with her tongue and that beautiful mouth of hers. He gave up trying to be quiet, moaning and writhing with every stroke. Her tongue lapped at his shaft, occasionally flicking her tongue at his tip.

Jim's moans were driving her wild and Martha simply couldn't resist any longer. She kicked off her shoes to the other side of the room and pulled off her dress, leaving her exposed. Despite it being Winter, she had chosen a dress that required her to wear no underwear. She grew hornier per second at the look on his face as she got ready to mount him and ride him like there was no tomorrow.